Monday, December 01, 2008

PLAX BEING PLAX

I was glad when the Steelers got rid of Plaxico because of his attitude, personality, and off-field problems. The Giants won a Super Bowl with him, but the Steelers won a Super Bowl without him, the year after his release.

The Steelers have always been good about avoiding or dismissing people like him. People in the media this morning are calling the latest incident a "first-time offense" but those who followed his career with the Steelers know this is not his first run-in with the law. Every Friday night he is a police report waiting to happen.

Plax is not too bright. I remember one game where he caught a ball across the middle, fell to the turf without being touched, jumped up and spiked the ball to make a statement, the way sulking WRs do when you finally throw them the damn ball, which in this case was a fumble of a live ball and should have but didn't teach him a lesson.

His buddies are apparently not much smarter. Antonio Pierce, his partner in crime, when asked how Plax was recovering from his injury, replied,
“I went to school for four years at the University of Arizona, but I didn’t get a doctorate, so I don't have that answer."

. . .because, for any other of his friends who may be reading, you get a doctorate to become a doctor to be able to know how your wounded friend is recovering.

Mayor Bloomberg has been emphatic that persons carrying unlicensed concealed weapons in New York will do 3-1/2 years in the slammer, no exceptions. I guess we'll just see about that.

UPDATE: Plax reportedly laughed and joked with a teammate on the phone last night. Today not so funny. Mayor Bloomberg:

Bloomberg said anything short of at least the 3 ½-year minimum for felony gun possession would be "a sham, a mockery of the law."

"I think it would be an outrage if we didn't prosecute to the fullest extent of the law, particularly people who live in the public domain ... If we didn't prosecute to the fullest extent, then I don't know who on earth you would."

"It's pretty hard to argue the guy didn't have a gun that it wasn't loaded. You've got bullet holes in and out to show it."


When the mayor tells the D.A. (and all the papers) that you must be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, and your "not guilty" plea includes a bullet hole in the leg and any number of witnesses and co-conspirators eager not to pay for their own complicity, my guess is that Michael Vick is more likely to wear an NFL uniform next season than Plax. And I'm okay with that.

3 comments:

Dude said...

ESPN pages lately are all sponsored by some sort of IQ testing agency. They entice click-throughs by posting the supposed IQ of the players mentioned on the page as if you will feel compelled to test yourself to prove yourself smarter. I just looked up Plax's career stats and was greeted with this proclamation:

Plaxico Burress’ IQ = 112
Are You Smarter Than Plaxico Burress? Take The IQ Quiz Now!

Made me laugh thinking that whatever algorithm they are using to come up with the random number gives a greater than zero chance that Plax would actually score in triple digits.

E said...

Those "Take the IQ Test!" links are suddenly everywhere, and somehow every famous person's IQ is well above average. I too laughed (in here) at Plax's impressive intellect, and I have seen Brett Favre (sometimes Farve) anywhere from 108 to 127. I recall you testing at 133 and I recall missing verdant=green on the test.

E said...

Links at the bottom of an ESPN page today have Ricky Williams' IQ at both 101 and 142. I'm going with 101. The avg Steelers' fan IQ is 99 and the avg Dolphins fan IQ is an incredible 142, with half of all Dolphins fans graduating college by age 14.

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