Monday, November 03, 2008


by Donovan

Last week, the minor league team Mudville Nine, with their lead player Casey, struck out at the Mudville game. At the final inning, Casey struck out while second and third bases were taken by fellow players Jimmy and Flynn. Most players dismissed the loss as just that, a simple game loss by the Mudville Nine of four to two.

The Mudville Nine was an up-and-coming team, winning game after game beginning in March 2006. People would flock to see the Mudville Nine and their star player, Casey. Crowds grew until the nation marveled at the success of the Nine. Several times they were offered sponsorships to go into Major League Baseball, but every player turned their offers down, including the owner and coach, claiming that “the Mudville Nine plays for home and home only.”

Many businesses grew dependent on the Mudville Nine. As the Nine attracted crowds of thousands, people set up small concession stands, and even some would sell unofficial Nine merchandise. These small businesses grew so successful that most of their proprietors made it their full time job.

The meager $5 ticket price that the Nine charged soon turned revenues of hundreds of thousands of dollars. Just before President Obama was elected, the Nine grossed $260,000 that faithful year of 2009.

Under Obama’s tax plan, the Mudville Nine is in a new tax bracket, and is considered “rich” by Obama. Because of this, they do not benefit from the tax breaks that Obama promised. The Mudville Nine were levied with heavy taxes, and they were forced to cut back on major expenses to afford the taxes.

The assets of the successful Mudville Nine include MVP Casey, a home field, practice field, and five practice coaches. Each of the practice coaches circulates their duties. Two practice coaches teach batting, one teaches game strategy, one leads practices, and one teaches field positions. The head coach of the Nine was forced to fire all but one of the practice coaches, and let go of the practice field in order to compensate for the new taxes.

Without these vital coaches, the rigorous training of the players was disrupted, including that of star Casey. Their training lagged for several weeks, with the coach having to lead the practices in his spare time. The head coaches’ responsibilities include scheduling games and team paperwork.

Before the coach firing, the team was working on a new batting strategy that was sure to help the Mudville Nine win by a landslide each time. The unfinished training left the Nine confused and lost in their strategy, forced to revert back to old ways mixed with new strategy.

The lack of training caused Casey to strike out in the game, not the last for Casey to strike out in since Obama’s term began. The three-in-a-row recorded losses in the last week has caused the Nine’s fan base to considerably dim from an average of six thousand game spectators to just fifteen hundred. The lack of fans at the game has caused the local businesses dependent upon the Mudville Nine to lose profits considerably. Just this week since the Nine’s last strike out; more than fifty merchandise and concession businesses have been forced to close shop.

Without the influx of money to the city of Mudville caused by the Nine and the associated businesses, many top economists are predicting that Mudville will be bankrupt within the year, due to overall declining tax revenue, as the baseball team is Mudville’s major economic base.

An interview with local businessman Willy Buckle, Jr. has revealed the hardship of the situation. Buckle operated a hot dog and drink stand at all Mudville games. He followed the team where ever they went throughout the Mudville area with his stand, making a usual profit of nearly $1,700 a week at games. Since the roll back of the Nine, Buckle was forced to close shop because of negative income. He stated his main worries are finding a new job to provide for his family, and being able to afford necessities in the mean time.

The Nine’s coach states that the team may have to be moved or carefully controlled to stay under $250,000, a practice which limits the success of the team itself.


A Note from Sir Saunders:
As I understand it, this essay is getting heavy circulation among 9th and 10th graders.


Revan said...

The general story behind this essay is that we received an essay assignment in English class.. We had to write about why Casey struck out in that famous poem. I took what would be a mundane assignment, and turned it into a political statement.

E said...

It is not much of a victory when people have to start doing the math whether they want to make more money or not!

9th and 10th graders don't pay taxes, you would think they would stand to benefit under the new regime.

Keep up the good work.

Sir Saunders said...

Good job on your essay. Keep the faith! We're counting on loyal Americans like you and honorable men of faith to carry the torch of Liberty well into the future. Keep up the good work! We've been through this before, but you were too young to remember. I remember when Clinton won how disappointed Tom and I were. But the conservative values won in the end. Liberty and Freedom will never die.

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